My latest gadget..

Gadget la sangat kan...lolz.  This is my new BBT thermometer.  Bought at caring pharmacy.  Hubby yg belikan sebab tu dia main beli je despite that I already informed beli if murah je.  And my murah is actually below RM20 sbb the last one that I bought was only RM15.  Was a Guardian brand.  But ok je jugak.  Am not sure how different this one is compared to my old one.  Lets see some of the basic functions here:

For oral, rectal and underarm temperature measurement
Unique broad sensor tip for comfort and more accurate measurement
Features�

* Fast measurement 60 seconds for oral
* Broad measuring tip gives a more comfortable and accurate reading
* 2 decimal reading, detecting changes as small as 0.01C
* Accurate - measures actual temperature in C and F
* Jumbo & clear display - Easy to read
* Last reading recall
* Buzzer- Beeps when measurement is completed
* Battery can be replaced

Apparently hasil google'an ku, this brand mmg recommended for those planning for pregnancy. And... some websites actually sell this same exact model with a more expensive price. So kira murah jugak la the price that we paid tu. Lucky us ya? Hihi..

If u wanna know more info bout BBT ni, i guessed u can just google sebab mmg banyak info on BBT and how it can help with pregnancy.  So sila la meng' gugle ye.

As for me, nak tahu cara2 I take my bbt ni?  Senang saja..

1.  Tiap2 pagi set jam at the same time.  Since kena bgn pukul 6am, so bila jam bunyi kul 6am tu, celik2 mata terus la capai thermometer ni.

2.  Masuk kan dlm mulut (bawah lidah) and tunggu sampai bunyi beep beep beep.  Then keluar kan, lap2 sket, off and masuk kan dlm sarong dia balik.

3.  The one that I used before and this new one is auto save for the last reading.  So x payah la susah2 nak catit kat kertas and so on kan.

4.  Then bila dah fully awake and on computer, enter the data dalam FertilityFriend.com.  Oh, of cos u have to register dulu kat FF tu ye. So every cycle dia akan tunjuk graf, indicate bila kita ovulate etc.

Itu saja... tatatititutu... ;p

Highlights of 2013 Budget

The yearly budget announcement has always been part of my career lives since the 1st year I worked. So tahun ni, walaupun daku bergelar surirumah (sementara ye!), it is not an excuse for me to look away from the announcement.  As a matter of fact, lagi la penting kena tahu sekarang as I am actively attending interviews now so definitely interviewers akan jadikan ini soalan2 cepumas mereka.  So I have to be ready.  I have to know la kan.  So here, I summarise some of the 2013 Budget Announcement that took place last Friday.  Summarise yg mana  berkenaan je la kot.  And u can also see my comments kaler purple yg ada initial CBW tu.

Personal tax and tax relief

Individual income tax rate to be reduced by 1 percentage point for the first RM50,000 of chargeable income.  [CBW: Will write on more detailed comparison of the above soon.]

Child tax relief to be increased from RM4,000 to RM6,000 per child (6x of basic child relief of RM1,000) for children aged 18 and above and receiving receiving full-time tertiary education, effective from year of assessment 2013.

Tax relief of RM3,000 for savings in the National Education Savings Scheme (SSPN) will be increased to RM6,000 for YA 2012 – YA 2017.

Bantuan Rakyat 1Malaysia (BR1M 2.0)

RM500 assistance money for a household earning less than RM3,000.  [CBW: This is the 2nd cash assistance be given since its first last year. The criteria remains the same per last year’s. Existing BR1M recipients are not required to register for the 2nd time. New applicant may register commencing Nov 2012 online or IRB offices, State Development Offices and District Offices.]

In addition, RM250 BR1M assistance money is extended for single unmarried individuals aged 21 and above with monthly income not more than RM2,000. [CBW: So maknanya adik2 ku yg tiga org tu layak la kan for this?  If yes, so happy for them ;p ]

BR1M 2.0 will be paid effective Jan 2013.

Real Property Gain Tax (RPGT)

RPGT will be increased to 15% for disposal of property within 2 years, 10% for disposal within 2 to 5 years, effective from 1 Jan 2013. After 5 years, it is not subject to RPGT. Currently, 10% RPGT for disposal within 2 years, 5% within 5 years, 0% after 5 years. [CBW: My Condo dah almost 5 years dah ni.. market price goes up like no one's business.. terfikir juga untuk jual and reinvest in a new property. Hmm... ]
RM200 rebate for 3G smartphone purchaseRM200 one-off rebate for purchase of one unit 3G smartphone from authorised dealers, for youths aged between 21 to 30 years with monthly income of RM3,000 or below. 

[CBW: Don't really agree with this, but looking at a bright side, perhaps I can get my darling sister to claim the rebate since she qualifies for it?]

Other goodies

Students in institutions of higher learning to get RM250 1Malaysia Book Voucher, an increase of RM50.

Passport fees for senior citizens and children aged 12 and below be reduced by 50% from RM300 to RM150 (5 years) and RM100 to RM80 (2 years). Effective from January 2013. [CBW: Age threshold for senior citizens is not made known yet. Could it be citizen aged 55 and above? or 60 and above]

All Malaysians with a monthly income of RM3,000 and below and who travel by KTM Komuter, will get 50% fare discount. Currently, only the disabled, retirees and students enjoy a 50% fare discount.

Minimum pension increased from RM720 to RM820 monthly for those who have served the govt for at least 25 years.

Passport processing charges is reduced to 50% i.e. from RM300 to RM150 for passport with 5 years validity and for 2 years validity is reduced to RM80. This also applies to children below the age of 12 years old. The new charges will effective January 2013.

Reduce sugar subsidy by 20 sen per kg from 29 Sept 2012. - [CBW: Which means we are paying 20 sen more on sugar. Thank god, our household intake for sugar is reduced as I stop consuming sugar since diagnosed with GDM]

PTPTN loan discount

Repayment of full loan from 1 October 2012 until 30 September 2013, a discount of 20% will be given on their loan. [CBW: It is still unclear whether 20% discount is on the outstanding loan or entire loan amount. It is likely that 20% discount will be given on the outstanding loan amount]

For those consistent repayment of PTPTN loan in accordance to their repayment schedule, a 10% discount per annum on their repayment will be given effective from 1 Oct 2012.

My First Home Scheme and 50% stamp duty exemption

My First Home Scheme income limit for individual loans raised from RM3,000 to RM5,000 per month, or in the case of joint loans of husband and wife of up to RM10,000 per month.

50% stamp duty exemption on sale and purchase agreements and loan agreements for purchase of the first residential property of up to RM400,000 (increased from RM350,000), be extended to 31 Dec 2014.

1.5x month bonus for public servants

Bonus of 1.5x month for public servants for year 2012. Half month paid during 2012 Hari Raya, remaining one month will be paid 50% in end Dec 2012 (50%) and in Jan 2013 (50%).

[CBW: This I am happy for my parents, families and friends yang bekerja dalam public sector ni. Walaupun hubby and myself mmg tak tergolong dalam kumpulan ni tapi kitaorg akur. Memang la ramai yg selalu compare that goverment banyak sided to govt sector employees. Tiap2 tahun ada je imbuhan for them. Kita yg di private sector ni, gigit jari je. In my opinion, x payah la nak compare2. rezeki and bahagian masing2. bersyukur je la dengan apa yg ada/dapat ok kawan2.]


Alrights ya all.. enough for now.  Actually banyak lagi incentives yg ada but takde sgt kaitan ngan saya.  Ada lagi insentif2 untuk pegawai2 tentera, polis etc.  also on pembinaan rumah mesra rakyat and so on.  Tapi tu sume kalau u all nak tau google je la yek.  I am currently Deciphering the Finance Bill 2/2012, will write about it soon, insyaAllah. 

My adorable fur-babies!

While listening to Najib's on tv, mari la kita berblogging sebentar.  Malas nak concentrate sgt... apa2 esok bleh baca paper... hihihi.. so.. since dah lama x write about my furkids, mari kita paste gambar2 cumel mereka di sini :)))

Tunggu time org nak tido, dia pun nak tido atas katil jugakk

Fluffy.. i think it's warm here sbb tu terjelepuk camni...

Rezki with her bantal busyuk!

My new dress... but now dah x muat sbb perut dah besar :))

Comel kan mereka? At this point of time tinggal 2 je kat rumah.... x larat nak bela ramai2.  ni pun tgh tggu rezki give birth.  As to now tatau lagi babies dia we all nak jaga or give away.  We shall see.... ;p

Some calls can't just be ignored!

As I mentioned in my previous post, I was having a very bad fever and super bad sore throat for the past few days.  So most of the time, I had to ignore the phone calls sbb mmg x larat sangat nak jawab and i can barely talk with my voice like itik.  So nak dijadikan cerita ada la few calls from the same unfamiliar number on Tuesday morning. Malasnya la nak angkat, so tgk je la the phone ringing.  After 4 calls, it stopped.  Thank god!  I can continue sleeping in peace now!

Later that day, I opened my gmail and saw an email from a headhunter:

Greetings from XXX!

Hi Ms Nazehah,

Thank you for sending your resume across. I have tried to call you numerous times, but to no avail.

Kindly return to my call or email me to advise on the best time to speak.

Thank you and good day ahead.

Best Regards,

XXX

Consultant - Accountancy & Finance

XXX

Level XXX, Menara 3 Petronas

KLCC, 50088 Kuala Lumpur

Malaysia

Alamak!! Dang!

Terus reply to that person and agreed on the time to speak i.e. the next day. Yelah nak borak2 the same day tu pun no point gak if i keep clearing my throat kan.

The phone call went well yesterday, ala dengan headhunter je pun and she wanted to understand my background better. About half and hour juga la. She sounded very confident of my resume. After the call, she asked me to reply her email with some details I have shared over the phone. Told her that I will do so and she can expect to see the reply first thing in the morning today.

So this morning at about 8.50am, I received another email from her:

Greetings from xxx!

Hi Ms Nazehah,

Thank you for your time over the phone yesterday.

I have forwarded your profile and this email to my client. I am very confident with your CV.

I will keep you updated in the progress of your application.

Thank you and good day ahead.

Best Regards,

Baru je nak reply email dia nak tanya how soon will I hear from the client... belum sempat nak click send, sekali dia call la pulak... she said the client has come back to her and is happy to read my CV (Alhamdulillah....). So the client wants to meet for an interview. Ohhh... alhamdulillah.. amin amin..

and follow by an email from her...

Greetings from xxx!

Hi Nazehah,

Thank you for your time and effort in attending this interview.

Please find the following interview details :

Company : xxxxx
Date : xxx October 2012
Time : 11.00AM
Address : Level xxxx, Menara xxxx,xxxx Jalan Ampang,50450 Kuala Lumpur
Website : xxxxxxx

Job Description of Tax Specialist

· You will be reporting to Tax Partners in Malaysia and Singapore.
· The position will see the candidate being groomed to a Tax Partner (exciting!)
· You will need to display capabilities in the following : Diligence, Analytical Skills and Representative (how you carry yourself) & excellent social attitude.
· Benefits includes Medical, Fitness Membership, Company phone, Laptop, 20 vacation days, and bonus pay out (6 months & may vary depending on business and individual performance)

I wish you all the best with the interview. Please let me know if you have any further questions.

Thank you.

Wow.... my first thought, wahh cepatnya semua process ni... within 2 days dah dapat invitation for an interview. Yelah, after months of job hunting, mmg most of the time berjanggut la tunggu company nak revert kan. and tu kalau yg revert. kalau x, pending jer la.. Alhamdulillah... even though tak sure lagi dapat ke tak but bersyukur sgt. So now nak prepare myself for the interview. Berdoa byk2 supaya dapat. Kawan2 doa for me too ok. Dah x larat nak dok umah rasa nya. Semoga semua nya dipermudahkan. Ada sorang kakak yg I'm close with ni selalu ckp

"Doa byk2 naz, kalau mmg rezeki naz, semuanya dipermudahkan"

InsyaAllah... Amin amin Ya Rabbalalamin...

Alhamdulillah, tak payah D&C!

Hi kawan2.. here's an update after few days.. muahahhaha...

Ok, today is exactly 2 weeks after my sad frustrating moments.. the lost of my pregnancy.  Alhamdulillah, I am much much better in terms of health and feeling,  oh... despite the fever that I am currently having, which the doctor said might be the post effect after the miscarriage.  2 hari juga la terbaring demam. Dengan sore throat and flu. adeh... i cant remember the last time i had fever. so agak lama juga sebenar nya since i last had fever. so no wonder la kali ni teruk sikit. huhu..

Anyways, last Monday (24 Sept 2012), I went to UMMC for gynae's appoinment to check if the miscarriage was complete.  Alhamdulillah, doctor confirmed that it was complete and clear.  All the content has come out.  so no need to do d&c procedure anymore.  Alhamdulillah.. lega saya mendengar. and yeap of cos that is what i wanna hear pun.  Takut weh buat d&c.  well, though i know it is just a very simple and normal procedure performed for pregnancy lost tapi ntah la.. after reading through the procedures, i think it is sangat mengerunkan.. :(

Another thing, I was told by the doctor to ensure my sugar level is monitored and controlled before planning for another pregnancy.  I need to get my sugar level checked consistently.. so mmg selalu akan ku tunjuk kan muka ku ni kat klinik kesihatan kat kj ni.  I definitely will take this seriously this time.  I need to change my lifestyle from now on.  No more sweet stuffs.  No more high carbs food. and consistent EXERCISE!!!

Nevertheless, sekarang ni masih dalam tempoh pantang.  Sampai bila ye kena pantang? I seriously don't know.  But from my reading, ramai yg ckp around 30 days.  lama kan? hmm.. xpe la.. pantang je la.. untuk diri sendiri juga... ohh... and untuk suami tersayang juga.. hihi.  oh and baru ku pantang bukan dari segi pemakanan saja ye.  badan x leh sejuk2.  kena pakai stoks bagai.  nak gi gym pun x boleh. x leh lasak2. mcm pantang bersalin juga. and in fact, from my readings too, pantang keguguran ni lagi kena jaga and pantang betul2 as compared to pantang bersalin.  Begitu la cerita nya...

Ok la peeps, sampai sini dulu la update untuk kali ni.  Nak entertain my parents in law yg datang melawat menantu kesayangan diorg ni.  hihi.. yelah, hubby kan outstation.. so menantu tinggal sorang la.. huhu...;p

Tatatititutu....

Hubby's off to JayBee!

Sunday morning! A lazy lazy sunday morning! Ala... x boleh lazy sangat la... pagi2 dah kena bangun nak gi Tesco. yes! today kitorg pergi tesco sangattttttttttttttt awal!! Reason being, hubby is leaving for JB tengahari nanti for 1 week. And the sad part is... this time I tak boleh ikottt... uwaaaa!! if it is not because of my doctor's appointment esok, sudah pasti I tak kan melepaskan peluang ikot hubby outstation!! well, that is the beauty of being a housewife kan? :)))

Sent hubby to his friend's house in Puchong sbb they all car pool pergi JB. Kalau I ikut, xde la dia nak car pool sbb i ada kan. Hehe.. so since I tak ikot ni, car pool la dia, xde la boring sgt sorang2.

Time cam ni rindu pulak kat hubby ku ni.. mcm ni la bila hidup berdua je... yelah belum ada anak lagi so life revolves around each other je la kan. Teringat hubby's spontaneous action before he left to JB tadi. He picked up Fluffy and kissed him, then he picked up Rezki and kissed her too. And said bye bye to them. Hehe so cute la him. Ok.. I mmg selalu buat camtu bila nk gi mana2 even before kawin lagi. But bila hubby buat camtu jugak, i feel touched... alhamdulillah bahagia betul rasanya dpt suami yg sayang kan meow meow juga.. :)

Okie dokie, nothing much to update tonite. Nak tido awal sikit malam ni. Am feeling not too well... cam nak demam pulak... sore throat dah start menyerang ni. Better take some medicine and go to bed now.

Tatatititutu ~

Selamat Tinggal Sayang Mummy..

I was still in Ipoh when it happened.  Two days after we were informed of our baby's non viable due to the absence of heartbeat I started to have on and off tummy cramp.  And of course followed by blood spotting and stained.  Though the tummy cramps were a little unusual from my normal menstrual cramps, it was still bearable.  Nothing much happened the whole day. So duduk la melepek dalam bilik hotel ni layan drama kat tv!

Petang tu, hubby came back from his work and asked if everything is ok.  I told him that I think I was undergoing the process as I had already started bleeding a little.  He said if there is too much bleeding, make sure I tell him immediately.  I nodded.  Risau bebenor laki ku ni... huhuhu... sayang bini la katakan.. hik hik..

At around 8pm, we went out to have dinner with his colleagues.  At the dinner, my cramps were a little bit bad than before... still I can actually bear with it.  I guessed my tolerance for pain is quite high hence I can still endure the pain of the process.  I am not sure how contraction during delivery feels like since I never give birth before.  But the cramp I was having were like every 2 mins. So tu kira cam contraction ke?  And I remembered at one point, the cramp was ultimately sucks!  I had to put down my folk and spoon and breath slowly.  And after that 1 ultimate pain, my cramps were suddenly disappeared.  I was so thankful!

We sat there chit chatting but I was quite restless and tired.  So I asked hubby if we can go now.  Hubby nodded.  Annndddd.....the moment I stand up from the chair, I can feel a chunk of jelly coming out from below.  Oh gosh!   Thank god I wore a sanitary.  But oppss! I touched the front part of my pants and looked at my fingers, it was BLOOD!  Alamakkkkk!! Nasib la pakai suar kaler hitam... so tak nampak la darah yg dah kena kat seluar ni...    

The moment we reached our hotel room, I straight away went to the toilet and checked.  There it was, a palm size placenta.  I called hubby and he looked at it.  I was reluctant to flush it down the toilet and insisted to bury it.  So hubby said ok and asked me to wash it.  While washing and flipping the placenta very carefully, my fingers touched a small fragile round balloon like shape.  As I was looking very closely at it and inside, there it was, our baby.  a very tiny little baby with tiny hands which have started developing.  He was very tiny.. pea size tiny.  I called my hubby again.  He looked and said "Dah besar dah" and I replied "Takpe la b, takde rezeki kita". :(

I was so amazed to see everything especially my tiny baby.  Not a single tears dropped.  It was a miracle.  I thank god for giving me the chance to hold my tiny baby with my fingers.  I was thankful that I chose to naturally miscarry and get to see everything that came out.  I guessed it was like a closure to me to see my tiny baby.

We washed everything up and kept in the freezer since we wanted to bring back home to bury it properly.  My dad buried my tiny baby at the Subang Jaya mosque.  Alhamdulillah.

Alhamdulillah, proces miscarry ni dipermudahkan.  Hubby said, anak kita ni anak yang baik.. dia keluar dengan baik dan mudah.  Told hubby that before I miscarried, I was telling our baby this:

"sayang, if sayang sihat, sayang stay ok, bertahan and be strong.  Tapi kalau sayang tak sihat, mummy redha kalau sayang kena keluar. mummy sentiasa doakan sayang"

And hubby hugged me. 

Sesungguhnya, kami redha di atas ketentuan Mu, Ya Allah.  Berilah kami ketabahan dan kekuatan yang berterusan.  Semoga ada rezeki untuk kami lagi.  Amin.

To my baby...

12.09.12  -  rest in peace baby mummy.. walaupun baby dalam rahim mummy hanya untuk 9 minggu, mummy & daddy happy sangat dengan kehadiran baby.  Tapi Allah lebih sayang kan baby.  Kami redha.  Tunggu mummy and daddy kat sana ye sayang.  Selain kenangan baby dlm rahim mummy, hanya gambar ultrasound scan yang mummy ada and mummy akan simpan.  Mummy akan sentiasa doakan sayang.

Al-Fatihah...

Umpama MIMPI DALAM MIMPI

Sorry for the long awaits! Life is quite busy it seems.  As promised, a long piece of post to be written by me as a remembrance of the recent event that I have just gone through.  A post for me to remember of the sweetness of the moment, though it was only for a very short while.  Ok tatau la how long kan the post will be kan, tapi untuk tak membosankan semua and x memenatkan diri sendiri menaip, will try to cut short some details yah!

Like many other married couple, unless if they are planning, having a baby would be the next thing on the list.  Same goes with us.  We got married in early 2011 and of course our next target is to conceive fast!  Our rezeki tak la secepat some other couples. Kawin2 dah conceived kan.  Kami redha.  Bahagian masing2 la kan.  Anyway, the fifth month of our marriage, my AF was late by 2 weeks and I dikejutkan by a vague double line on a UPT that I did at home.  Not to get very excited about that, we act like nothing happened.  we do things that we always do like usual.  Little that I know, a very early pregnancy is indeed very fragile.  I lost the pregnancy  at 4 weeks.  Nak kata sedeh mmg la sedeh.  But because we didn't really expect it and tak sempat pun nak pergi check kat clinic masa ada 2 lines tu, so bila miscarriage tu, kami masih boleh terima.  We went to the clinic after the miscarriage.  Did the UPT and confirmed pregnancy lost.  Since I was quite stable, no tummy pain and not bleeding excessively, I was asked to go home and rest.  Doc ckp kalau sakit sgt perut tu, then come back sbb takut ada complication etc.  Alhamdulillah, after a week or two I stop bleeding and start la tempoh berpantang time tu.

Time passed by and of course we tried again and again and again each month.  But it is beyond our control and week after week, month after month, we still didn't conceive.  Kami redha. Dah berstick2 UPT to di pee kan but still no double lines.  Hmm... belum rezeki.... takpe la, Allah lebih mengetahui apa yg terbaik untuk kami.

Ramadhan 2012, approximately 1 year 5 months of our marriage, once again, for the second time, my UPT was positive.  Kali ni mmg unexpected juga.  What happened was, I felt it was kinda weird that Ramadhan was ended but my AF still did not show up.  Of cos, i have already started feeling the cramping on and off.  Nak buat UPT, I had ran out of stock sbb asyik dok pee jer atas stick tu before this.  So.. I just waited for the AF to show itself.  Waited for few days, but hey! cannot tahan.  So pergi juga la ke Guardian beli the pregnancy test.  And there it was.. a stick with 2 very clear lines!  Again, we do not want to be too excited about it.  We went to a clinic to confirm the pregnancy and Alhamdulillah, it was 4 weeks.

And so, we went through the raya dengan penuh berdebar2.  Menjaga setiap langkah and pemakanan.  MIL was so concerned that she refrained me from doing any house chores during raya.  Mmg byk berehat je la sbb semua org pun suruh berehat kan.

After came back from hometown, I had my 1st check up at KKKJ a week after Syawal 2012.  And I was at 6 weeks.  Alhamdulillah.. passed the week when I had my miscarriage before.  Nevertheless, due to my family history of diabetes and my VERY VERY BAD BMI, I was asked to do a Modified Glucose Tolerance Test (MGTT).  I was asked to fast the night before the test.  The first blood sample was taken in the morning before I was asked to drink a glass of glucose drink and another blood sample was taken 2 hours after that.  As expected, my result was BAD!  7.7 mmol before and 12.6 mmol after.  :(

Due to that, I was again, asked to do a Blood Sugar Profile (BSP) the following week.  At this time I was 7 week pregnant.  And again, my BSP was not that good either.  6.7mmol/5.6/7.8/4.6.  My result de-ranged and the Doctor confirmed I was having a gestational diabetes i.e. diabetes during pregnancy.

Since then, I had to control my diet.  No more sugar or high intake of carbs for me.  I was ok... for the sake of the baby, i did control my diet.  I was scheduled for my 1st scan the coming week.  As much as I was so worried about my baby, I was also so excited to see him.  

And the nightmare began..

It was the 10th of September 2012.  The day we were scheduled for the scanning was the day hubby had to go for his audit field trip in Ipoh.  Of course I would be following him lah since I am currently a full time housewife kan.  We went for the scanning in the morning.  We did the scanning at this place not far from the KK.  After the scanning, I was asked by the sonographer to go back to the KK and show the MO their findings.  I asked if everything was ok and the sonographer just asked us to go back to the KK and the MO there will let us know the result from the scan.

After a very very very long WAIT, I finally saw the MO.  Luruh seluruh jantung, when I was told that my baby had no heartbeat! The MO said that I had to go for a D&C to remove the embryo.  Ya Allah, I was speechless.  I asked if I could call my hubby in.  And when I told him, I can see how upset and shocked he was.  I  think I was more frustrated to see his sadness.  I was straight away referred to the hospital.

We went home after that.  I was crying so badly in the car.  Hubby was just driving quietly.  I guessed he was too shocked that he lost his words to say anything to comfort me.  I was still crying when we reached home and headed straight to bed.  The tears just would not stop.  I asked Allah... 

WHY? WHY? WHY? 

Why did he give me the baby and took it back?

What have I done wrong?

Was it because I tak cukup memanjatkan kesyukuran maka Dia ambil balik baby dalam kandungan I?

My questions were left hanging... 

Hubby came, he lied next to me, touched my back and said "sayang, it's ok".  Then he came nearer and held me in his arms.  Makin laju la I nangis.  It was just silence.. well except for my tears.  After about half an hour I was in his arms, and by that time I had already stop crying, he asked, if I was ready to go to the hospital.  I said yes.

We went to UMMC emergency.  By that time it was already 3pm.  The waiting was not too long before my name was called.  The MO asked some questions, took my blood and urine sample and asked to wait for a gynae to come.  About half an hour after that, the gynae arrived.  She was so comforting.  She explained all the things that I need to know.  I just fall in love with her immediately.  She did the TVS scanning and said that she could clearly see the embryo and  yeap.. no heartbeat.  I was given 2 options either to remove my baby using D&C procedure or a natural miscarriage.  After giving some thoughts and considerations, I told her that I want to go for a natural process.  She nodded and asked to come back in 2 weeks time for re scanning.  She did mention that if the process happened within the 2 weeks, unless there is excessive bleeding (based on my own judgement), I should straight away rush to the hospital.  Otherwise, it is ok to let my body to withdraw the content from my uterus naturally.  After 2 weeks she will re scan to confirm whether my miscarriage was complete or not.

We went home from the hospital and I was so much better than before.  I have started to accept what was happening.  Hubby asked if I still want to follow him to Ipoh and I said yes.  I just did not want to be alone when the process happens.  

So we drove to Ipoh that very night.

p/s:  to be continued... with when the process happened...

Some very brief highlights of the past ;p

Just before i continue updating the blog with current events/thoughts, lets just highlight some major events that happened in the past two years.. well basically after my last post in 2010.. lolz. :)))

- Engaged in June 2010

- Married in March 2011

- Resigned from my work in January 2012


So what do u think? Very brief right? Reason being i would not want my readers to feel bored reading things that happened in the past 2 years. I have more long entries coming and i have to warn you that it is gonna be a long one so bear with it ya! And... it's gonna be a sad and heartbreaking post too. so have your tissues ready peeps!

Making a come back?

I have been wanting to re blog again but often i ended up reading my old posts and forget about writing.  Many things happened throughout the 2 years plus since my last post.  Sooo.... many things.. indeed!  Happy, sad, ups, downs.. things that i should have jotted down here but I did not.  It is not about not having time to write.  I just lost the mood / interest to write. for some unknown reason, which i myself do not know.

Nevertheless, this time.. i am taking a step at a time.  Of cos i can't expect my blog to suddenly have it's life back after so long.  But it will soon have.  :)

p/s:  so that i don't offend anyone, some previous posts need to be deleted/hide.  So more work for me to go through my previous posts before re setting my blog to public again :))