Who would have thought that I would decide to cover my head last year (i.e. 1430H)?
Neither would i.
Yes, i do have have the intention to wear tudung one day... but it was just intentions. Or the earliest time i could think of to cover my head would be after i get married... that is if my husband would asked me to!
I was a stucked up daughter who would always go against my parents all the time when it comes to covering head. After all, my other siblings are all free-haired so why would i be bothered to cover mine? The only time I could remember me covering my head was during my kindergarden time as the kindergarden i attended was a Tadika Islam. Oh and also, when i attended sekolah agama during primary time. Other than that, it would be during agama lessons in school and UIS classes in the Uni. Tu pun, it was not like I was wearing proper tudung. Just as long as I covered my head with a piece of cloth regardless how jarang the selendang was, then it was ok.
As I grow older, my dad would always make known to us (me & the sisters) that he wants us to wear tudung. To no surprise, i gave him all sort of excuses of not wearing tudung for me & on behalf of my sisters. Mainly ~ "I'm not ready", "I don't want to be a hipocrite", "Ala, igt sumer org pakai tudung tu baik sangat ke", "Macam kampung la", "Daripada depan mama&ayah kitaorg pakai tudung, then blkg kitaorg bukak, baik x payah", and the list goes on....
I once had an argument with the boyfriend on this tudung thingy. I can still remember, it was in One Utama when we had our snacks at Burger King. Oh masa tu, I was so firmed of not wanting to wear tudung. Kelakar jugak bila fk balik. Penat jer gaduh!
Ok so how did I get the "hidayah"?
Honestly, i can't exactly remember how. Cuma, early 2009, tiba-tiba I realised that I was sooo into browsing tudung on the internet. I would browse on different ways of wearing tudung. I observed people who cover their heads. All these about tudung and covering head suddenly become an interest to me.
Yang paling tak disangka, i woke up one morning, opened my eyes and suddenly I have this feeling of wanting to perform umrah sooooo much. I went downstairs, dengan x mandi sumer lagi, I told my dad my intention. He was very surprised and of course happy (sebab late 2008, he did ajak me to do umrah but as usual i gave him all sort of reasons!). And from that moment on (eh, cam lagu shania twain pulak.. hehe!), I decided to cover my head after balik from Umrah.
Alhamdulillah, it is now 7 months umur penghijrahanku. Automatically, bila dah bertudung, pakaian pun dah x macam dulu sangat. Of cos, tak la drastic giler tutup aurat sumer but slowly, there are improvements. And at the moment, I just cover my head bila keluar rumah je. Belum la sampai tahap, keluar sidai baju or siram pokok bunga pun sarong tudung. And belum juga tahap org dtg rumah pun i pakai tudung jugak. Hehe.. slowly... a step at a time :)
And of course, dalam hati sentiasa berdoa supaya penghijrahan ni berkekalan. Takut jugak if it is just hits of the moments and that one day tiba2 rasa tak nak pakai tudung balik. Yelah, kita ni manusia biasa je... dugaan banyak, datang dari semua angle. Tapi, alhamdulillah, i have my close friends and the boyfriend who are being very supportive. My sisters, even though they are still free-haired, they are the most coolest and supportive sisters i ever have.
And of course, my parents are the most happiest people of all to see that their most stucked up daughter has changed.
So readers... doa kan I ye supaya Allah SWT tetap kan hati I dengan pilihan yang i buat ni and jauhkan dugaan2 dari anasir2 jahat ye.
Last but not least, Selamat Menyambut Maal Hijrah 1431H to all muslim readers. Semoga tahun ni lebih bermakna untuk kita semua.
THROUGH HER THICK & THIN
“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
This is a personal blog about a woman - as a daughter, a wife, a career woman, a homemaker, a mommy - and her thoughts and feelings through out her personal/work lives, as a citizen of her beloved country, her previous journey to motherhood and her journey as a mommy. This blog has no intention to offend or to have an influence on anyone. Read at your cost. Erti kata lain, if x suka, u r welcome to click the "X" on the top right hand corner. Erti kata lain lagi, tak payah ler baca...